The Personal Touch
One of the primary theories proven in Final Four Leadership is that it takes a different skill set to lead a group of men as opposed to leading a group of women. That’s not a bad thing nor a good thing, it just is what it is. The successful female leaders profiled in the book have developed a number of strategies that help them relate to and motivate the individuals under their guidance. The good thing is that these strategies apply to either gender.
When the term, Personal Touch, is tossed on the table of a leadership discussion, the first thought that bangs into your brain is “touchy-feely.” Which leads one to think that you’re ’soft’ in your leadership style. Soft, obviously, is not used here as a term of admiration.
When I talk about personal touch, however, I’m not talking about creating a personal relationship with those whom you lead (although that can happen). I’m talking about making a personal connection. There’s a difference.
Individuals will come to your team, your department, your company from different backgrounds, different social circumstances, different levels of education, with different personalities and different agendas.
Likewise, each of these individuals has a different measurement of success, a different way in which they like to be recognized and certainly a different manner in which they are motivated.
One size does not fit all. Male leaders sometimes have a difficult time grasping this concept. I’m reminded of a scene at a freshmen girl’s basketball game a few years ago. The coach was a male, and during timeouts he would yell at and chastise these 14-15 year old girls. You could see that the players tuned him out as soon as his voice began to rise. A colleague said to him, “you can’t yell at girls the same way you yell at boys.” The response from the moronic coach was, “why not?”
Retired Hall of Fame women’s coach, Jody Conradt, said, “Because you are dealing with people, you can’t have a cookie cutter approach. You have to constantly find ways to not just relate to people, but to understand whatever it is that is motivating them. There are certain things that everybody has to be treated the same, abiding by team rules and things like that. But everybody communicates differently, everybody accepts criticism differently and everybody needs praise to a different level. I think the real secret…trying to figure out what everybody needs, what motivates them, what brings out the best in them, and trying to do that.”
Invest the time in making personal connections with your co-workers. Add it to your leadership tool box and watch performance improve.
Leadership thought for the week: Don’t hold grudges, just move on.”